Summer is kicking my ass. My kids are always. here. Right. Here. With me. Always.
I have all the time in the world to get on the computer. Write funny posts. Work on that goddamnnovelthatwillneverseethelightofday. Catch up on the other blogs. Get really good at that accounting job I’m doing for Scott. Clean something. Anything. Yeah, I haven’t done any of those things.
But mostly I just wander around the house making them food, cleaning up their food, running to the grocery store for more supplies of food… They are hungry hungry creatures. They eat an inordinate quantity of ice cream.
This constant feeding of them saps my strength. It makes me feel like not logging on, not tuning in, not typing back.
We did get out of the house for a few days. The girls and I went to the lake with my mother. I hate lakes. All of the lakes in Georgia are manmade. They are stagnant finite volumes of water slimy with mud and clay squishing between your toes as they fill up with the excrement of so many fish. It is unnatural. Also? They never find the bodies. People drown every year in these lakes and they can’t recover the bodies. Where are the bodies?!
I told the girls to look around for any suspicious looking body parts while they were swimming but they didn’t find anything.
They also had a water park at this lake. Yes, water parks also have the potential icky factor as you walk around an amusement park in your bare feet and bathing suit. However, they also had some kind of mystical double floaty tube thing with magical powers. When the girls were in the secret hold of the magical tube they played together and got along. I have photographic evidence.
There’s really nothing quite like a water park on a lake in Georgia. It’s the redneck trifecta. You know how you can tell? The signs they post.
Can’t you just see them coming up with the rules? Well, we’ll have to add that one about not runnin’. Sure Bubba but you know what the real problem’s gonna be? Them peoples gonna blow their noses in the goddamn wave pool. We should tell them not to do that. Yep, we should.
Oh well. The girls had a great time and I got to hang out with my mom for a few days which is always good.
And before the summer ends we’ll hit the beach with my sister’s family so we can soak our bodies in the cleansing salty sandy ocean and clear ourselves of any residual lake muck. I can’t tell you when we’re going. You know how Scott feels about that.
I live by the motto: “If I can’t spout,I’m out!”. It’s served me well.
I think the “no cut-offs” is almost more indicative of the redneck fest. Actually, I’m surprised it didn’t say “no cut-off’s.” Pleasantly surprised!
Muskrat´s last blog ..by air and by sea- to see a newly minted 4-year-old
I read somewhere that the average person drinks 2.5 gallons of pool water in a life time. If that’s not enough to skieve me out then I don’t know what whould. That said, we’re making the annual treck to our local water park this week. It’s the one they filmed the new movie “Grown Ups”, you know the scene with the blue pool water?? Yeah, I’ll be keeping my mouth good and closed. -J
My boys have been after me for weeks to take them to a water park. I keep pretending I don’t hear them for a couple of reasons. You’d think the first reason would be my fear of wearing a swimsuit in public, but if I was being honest, I’m haunted by the idea that there is ALWAYS a used bandage either floating in the water or anywhere you want to walk when you’re walking (no running!) around the pool deck.
foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog)´s last blog ..and when youre wise enough- youll know
Man made lakes? The hell?
Captain Dumbass´s last blog ..Summer So Far
Thank you Becky!!! Love love love hearing from you.
You crack me up – I mean the rules – that was OUT LOUD LAUGHING. So miss Georgia!!!!! LYLAS, E
We swim in our lake all the time. And duh. All those scary things that live in the lake eat the bodies. I saw a 6 foot Carp in our lake once. True Story. It was a whole year before I swam in there again.
♥Spot
Spot´s last blog ..The one where its all about us and we go on a mini-adventure
Glad to see you’re back and that last picture of your girls is Christmas card worthy, don’t you think?
I think the heat saps blogging mojo. Bring on fall.
Carabee´s last blog ..Lost and Found
I hate lakes…fish, pee in lakes, essentially swimming in fish pee. I know same thing happens in the ocean, but the ratio off fish pee to water has to be much less right? And the salt, yeah, the salt magical fish pee dissipating sea salt. Oceans good, lakes bad.
Lisa´s last blog ..A Day in the Life
We don’t swim in lakes in Florida because there are ALLIGATORS. And snakes.
I don’t miss the rednecks. You can’t pee in public why is it that spitting is no problem (except at the water park)?
Ev says Parker’s hair looks good. So that’s something lake water is good for, you negative Nellie.
Lakes. *shudder* It’s really the squishy lake bottom that skeeves me out the most. More then walking around barefoot in a water park. But just a bit more.
The ocean’s where its at, baby. All that good salt just sterilizes everything!
PS – the girls are adorable.
justmakingourway´s last blog ..Lawn Zen
at least you’ve been taking pictures!! i can’t even seem to manage that. thank god for all the other people with the cameras.
also: bodies lost in man made lakes? i’m not scared of freaking sharks anymore.
The other day, I told my husband that I walk around in a perpetual, bent-at-the waist position because all I do is pick shit up all day long. Seriously. I’m either breaking up an argument or picking up cheesestick wrappers, socks or whatever else the kids feel the need to just toss to the rug. You can’t get online when you have to pick shit up all day.
Hey it’s summer vacation. The kids aren’t reading and writing…when in Rome.
By the way – that lady in the mint green bikini is the EXACT reason why I don’t like to be in the background of pictures (especially when swimwear is involved).
I gagged a little reading that sign. Suddenly, I very much appreciate our glacially cold, deep water, PNW lakes. Nothing can live in them. They freeze bacteria on contact.
anymommy´s last blog ..To all the boys Ive known before
I LOVE that lake! We are members of the water park…I don’t care about the ickyness at all – my kids are occupied and my sanity is safe for another day…
veryanniemary´s last blog ..That’s love- that is…
Although I thought I would lose a child on that H20 drop into a deep pool after having been flung around a bowl at high speed slide…yeah – not good
veryanniemary´s last blog ..That’s love- that is…
When Parker and Tempel are playing nice it makes for great pics, but when they aren’t playing nice it makes for great stories. Hmm, which do I prefer? … Way to go, Becky, for threatening Carolyn into blogging. More threats, please.
X´s last blog ..When Your Mom ‘Friends’ You on Facebook
Goose!
Your girls are so beautiful! Love that last photo.
the mama bird diaries´s last blog ..blogher it’s over really!
[...] are no natural lakes or ponds in Georgia – none at all. I have no problem with this, unlike Carolyn who is a little more squeamish about it than I. Even the thought of the unrecovered dead bodies [...]